a golden corral expedition

 

Yesterday was one of the most fulfilling days I’ve had since volunteering at Wood Manor.  I set up a lunch date with Frank and Harold.  It was a blast!  Harold got into a serious car accident 15 years ago and can’t walk.  He’s only 40 years old but yet he has to stay in an assisted living home.  We got in his van, specifically designed with him in mind, and headed to Golden Corral.  I was in the back seat and took this picture.  Harold still sits in his chair to drive.  When we got in he mentioned he’s only driven a few times in the last 10 years!  My heart started beating a little quicker.  As he turned up his radio dial, I headed down the road with these two men (one 40 year old with major physical setbacks and a 76 year old man) jamming to rock music!  They were like two teenagers again. 

After eating lunch and heading back to Wood Manor, they asked me how long I would keep coming by?  I told them I hoped for a very long time.  They said, “you don’t get paid?” I said “no”.  They replied, “why are you doing it?”.  I commented back, “because I want to and you guys need someone to keep you young”.   

I was reading in scripture this morning in the book of John. 

“the word became flesh in blood, and moved into the neighborhood” 1:14 

That’s simply it.  This place is about 150 yards behind my backyard fence.  They are a forgotten group of people to this community.  Many don’t have any family or friends that come and visit them.  They are awaiting their future destiny.  Yet they have so much life and wisdom to offer.  I can’t wait till warmer weather so I can create a trail that will lead straight over there so I can walk.

I am not someone that makes tons of money.  I am not someone that portrays myself as a volunteer God-send.  I don’t have much, but I have some hands and feet.  Is there anyone that is forgotten that might live near you or in your community that you could give 30 minutes a week too?  All you have to do is walk and lift a hand and I promise you it will be one of the most fulfilling blocks of time in your entire day.

 

monkey off my back

 

it seems like whenever i send out an encouraging email or blog about something it comes back to get me.  yesterday was my grueling monday that i usually just try to survive.  i inspect houses all the way to okc for my monthly mtg and then while inspecting more houses on the way back into town, attempt to make my two pt sessions.  it’s usually no less than a 14 hour day.  i had a blow out on the way into tulsa and nearly swerved off the road and pretty much wet myself in doing so. 

i was eager to begin this day and it is always refreshing to spend time at wood manor with my elderly friends.  i received an uplifting call from one of my all-time best friends.  i was able to make some of my dad’s homemade chili for some friends – the whole day was so recharging.  it’s funny a year ago people drained me and i remember telling my mom, “i don’t like people anymore”.  now people charge me and i am beginning to take on our town’s hero Will Roger’s who once said, “i never met a man i didn’t like“.

for the past several months i have had this crazy stinken monkey on my back that just hasn’t gone away.  it has been this burden and huge stress in my life.  i had surgery back in october and was supposed to have a certain amount that was out of pocket and no more.  well, i’ve been getting all these bills in the mail and they’ve been freaken wearing me down.  when it comes to dealing with an insurance company it is like walking into lowe’s to get hardware for my father-in-law.  it’s like singing hymns to high school students.  it’s been a frustrating process to say the least.

well….. the human resource lady at my work calls me today and i was able to explain my ignorance and basically beg for her intervention.  she had me fax some stuff and made a few calls.  she worked it out in a matter of an hour and acted like it was no big deal.  johann relieved me of a huge monkey on my back.  she took away a burden that weighed a million pounds.  i was simply honest with her and asked for her help no matter how dumb i looked. 

do you ever reach that point where the pain is so great you just simpy have to reach out to someone else and don’t care how it makes you look?  perhaps you need to call a johann today to relieve a burden or monkey on your back.  maybe on the other side of the coin you can choose to be a johann to someone else that you know needs a burden lifted.  who can you call?

honesty with god

This past week I heard of a two year that drowned in a pool by accident.  I attended a funeral for an elderly woman that died unexpectedly.  I had a friend that almost lost his wife during childbirth.  A friend of mine was put in jail.  One of the men in the nursing home I volunteer at is 41 years old and he told me 15 years ago he was in an accident and was told he would never walk again.  His wife divorced him after finding out the news.  One of my personal training clients told me recently that after just a few years of marriage her husband died out of the clear blue.   

Have you ever experienced something that caused you to ask yourself, “why is this happening to me and not someone else?  Have you ever questioned God and asked him why he didn’t prevent something?  Have you ever been angry at him for those of you that believe in him?  Are we allowed to be angry at him? When these things happen it seems like others try to fix us.  They try to teach us but yet avoid us.  They don’t want to weap with us or mourn with us.  They just want to celebrate with us when we’re on the other side.  They want to be on top of the mountain with us and be the one that helped us get there not the one in the valley.  Others want to remain positive and just pretend the wound on a fellow soldier will go away.  People will say things like, “I know what you’re going through or I’m praying for you”.  They end up being numbing pain killers. 

Do you ever wish you were close enough to God to be angry with him?  Perhaps you need a moment to just get mad, be negative, angry, and just let it out.  We want to complain to others and not to God.  Perhaps each of us at times need a moment to be real and let it all out.  Sometimes I think we have this theology of control in which we can handle it and get through it on our own. 

 I love the guy named David in the Bible.  In the book of Psalms he just lets it all out on God.  He doesn’t hold anything back.  Jesus right before the cross quotes a verse saying, “God why have you forsaken me?”.  I love it because it reminds me that I can’t experience victory unless I’m willing to endure suffering.  See if you eliminate the pain of galgotha and the cross, you eliminate the celebration.  The pain is part of the story.  Faith is being honest enough and not faking it.  Come to a place and tell him exactly how you feel.  You’ve got a father that can take it.  Allow him to bring up stuff that we’ve covered up. 

Have you ever had a d-day?  Have you ever experienced something in your life that just completely knocked you off your feet?  I had one about six months ago when I was told I had a tumor. 

   

larry legend

I’m so pumped.  This August my family is taking a vacation to Louisville Kentucky for an ironman.  I just found out that Frenchlick Indiana is only an hour away.  This happens to be the place in which one of my two childhood sports heroes grew up.  I’m looking forward to seeing Larry Bird Blvd, Spring Valley HS where he played, and the house where he lived.

It’s said that he splits time between a home in Florida and Frenchlick to this day and is seen meandering through his old town occasionally.  How cool would it be for me to be able to see him?  He inspired me so much in my junior high years that I think I was the only Celtics fan in the entire state.  I still have an old VHS tape called Larry Legend and watched in a hundred times growing up.  I still remember shooting hoops with my best friend Brian and would say, “Biiiirrrddd for threeeeeeee” while taking shots!

So…… say a prayer and maybe I’ll be able to meet the famous, “Hick from Frenchlick“.

i’m not a perfect parent

 

Today was an awesome sabbath day.  It was nice to unplug for a while and spend some good quality time with my family.  Tonight we went to eat with some friends and dropped the boys off with Amy’s aunt and uncle.

 Upon picking them up we found out Camden had decided to bite his cousin on the arm, which left a nasty little mark.  I felt embarrased and horrible.  Camden is only three and a boy, but sometimes it just leaves me with mixed feelings.  Do i not discipline him enough?  Did he learn to bite from me?  I can’t remember biting people recently.  Is he doing this to draw attention?  Is he behaving like this due to having a little brother in the picture now?  All of a sudden times like this can question your parenting skills.  It makes me want to go read five books on parenting or question everything I do as a parent.  Immediately you can allow yourself to get caught up in the comparison game and look at what others are doing and how their kids behave.

Isn’t it amazing how wise older parents are in times like these?  They can come across as perfect parents that never had any issues with their kids.  It seems to me the longer people are removed from “being in the trenches” in this thing called parenting the better they were at it.  It is kind of like the former high school football player that is sharing the stories with his old buddies twenty years later about how he was the all-stater when really he sat the bench.

Isn’t it funny that other parents are always the one that need to discipline their kids more?  Isn’t it crazy that other parent’s just need to get a handle on their kids?  We as parents can really come across as quite the experts when gazing upon another child mis-behaving. 

I am not a perfect parent and struggle with how i’m going at it each day.  I screw up as a parent daily and kick myself for it.  I question my ability and pray so hard that i’ll discipline and love my boys in the right way.  There’s no manual for parenting or how to’s for nailing this thing down.  We try so hard in certain areas because we don’t want our kids to deal with things we dealt with.  Each day is a learning experience and we can only hope to move forward and grow as a parent.  I may not be perfect but I will be loving and commit myself for the long-haul to improve as much as I can.

I am determined to minimize the things that might be wrong with my boys and maximize the good in them.  What if all we did is look at the weaknesses in our spouse?  Our marriages would be done rather quickly.  In the same way with our kids I believe we’ve got to encourage all the good in them and not focus on only the things they do that gets them in trouble.

We struggle with Camden in areas of him playing rough with other kids.  But yet he is the most people-oriented kid in the world.  He can meet a complete stranger and make them feel like they are his best friend!  I love that and he challenges me as a three year old to treat all people as my friend and an equal.  I choose to maximize that in him and not dwell on the other.  We’ll work on things and not let him get by with them, but man I just want my kid to be loved more for the good behavior than the bad.

Do you ever feel like that?  Do you ever question yourself as a parent?  Are you a perfect parent? 

red cross on my sleeve

 

Last year I watched a movie called, “Letters from Iwo Jima” directed by Clint Eastwood.  There was a scene in which, as the American soldiers were invading the islands, General Tadamichi Kuribayashi (try saying that out loud) gave his soldiers a command that I will never forget. He told his men that as the Americans approach focus all your attention on locating the soldiers with a red cross on their sleeve.  He informed them if they kill them, they kill their doctors, which meant no recovery from injuries.  He told them to kill them first. 

Have you ever noticed the moment you start encouraging someone, blogging about the positive, and deciding to make a daily pursuit to serve Christ and others that you automatically place a red cross on your shoulder or become a gigantic bullseye? Six months ago Amy and I made the decision to begin serving our community.  Within a week I received three speeding tickets.  Within a month I had to have surgery to remove a possible cancerous tumor.   A little over a month ago I decided to give up my Tuesdays and Thursdays to volunteer and love people in Claremore.  This week I’ve never felt the red cross so deeply on my arm.  I am a positive person and don’t care to dwell on listing just random nerve-racking experiences that have taken place to simply sway my focus – which I wrote about Monday (any coincidence in that?). 

James 1:2-4 says, “Consider it a sheer gift friends, when test and challenges come at you from all sides.  You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors.  Let it do its work so you can become mature and well developed, not deficient in any way”  

My mom called last night and mentioned to me that she had a dream that there was a demon after me.  That sounds crazy to me, but looking back this past week I believe it.  The cool part is what I read this morning in Luke 22:39-53, here’s an exerp: 

“he pulled away from his disciples and knelt down and prayed, “father, remove this cup from me.  but please, not what i want.  what do you want?  at once an angel from heaven was at his side, strengthening him.  he prayed on all the harder. 

Perhaps that was Jesus’ guardian angel?  I don’t know.  But I’m not alone and neither are you.  As there are demons battling in the spiritual realm we’ve got angels fighting them away!  I love the fact that this angel strengthened Jesus and caused him to pray all the harder – right during jesus’ darkest most lowest hour.  He was about to sacrifice his life so the world could be forgiven of sin and receive god’s ultimate love.   

Many in the early church were persecuted physically, perhaps Satan’s way in us is emotionally and psychologically – get us depressed and prevent us from moving forward by placing road blocks so we’ll give up on certain things.   One of Jesus hardest experiences was out in the desert where he was tempted by Satan.  What did he do?  He quoted scriptures.  I Peter 4:1 says,

“since Jesus went through everything you’re going through and more – learn to think like him”

 I look back on scriptures I’ve read in the past three months and these are what I had written down and I hope it can encourage someone else. “Not that the troubles should come as any surprise to you.  You’ve always known that we’re in for this kind of thing.  It’s part of our calling and its quite clear that there was trouble ahead” I Thess 3:3-4 states 

 “I welcome the chance to take my share in the church’s suffering.  When I became a servant in this church, I experienced this suffering as a sheer gift” Colossians 1:25

 “His powerful Word is sharp as a surgeon’s scalpel” Heb 4:12 

Hebrews 11:32-38 “the world didn’t deserve them” 

“God is there, ready to help; I’m fearless no matter what.  Who or what can get to me?” Heb 13:6 

“Anyone who meets a testing challenge head-on and manages to stick it out is mighty fortunate” James 1:12 

“If with heart and soul you’re doing good, do you think you can be stopped? Don’t give the opposition a second thought” 1 Peter 3:13 

“When life gets really difficult, don’t jump to the conclusion that God isn’t on the job.  Instead be glad that you are in the very thick of what Christ experienced.  This is a spiritual refining process, with glory just around the corner” 1 Peter 4:14 

“If you find life difficult – trust him, he knows what he’s doing” 1 Peter 4:19  

“God knows how to rescue the godly from evil trials” II Peter 2:9 

I am determined to quote everyday that I serve: 

“This is the post to which I’ve been assigned, and I’m sticking to it as long as I live” II Peter 1:14 

No weapon formed against me shall prosper.  During middle school I can remember my dad on way to school challenging us and praying that his kids would put on the full armor of God and I still pray that over myself. 

I claim Hebrews 10:39 “But we’re not quitters who lose out.  Oh no! We’ll stay with it and survive trusting all the way.”  

Are you encouraging someone?  Are you on a daily pursuit to follow Christ?  Are you giving yourself for others?  Do you feel like you have a red cross on your shoulder?  A bullseye?   Welcome to being a Christ follower.  And know this – you are not alone.  My desire is that we wouldn’t be like the disciples who fell asleep and stopped praying for Jesus in his troubling time.  Lets be there for each other.  Lets all grab ahold of Hebrews 13:8 and say it over each other:

“Pray for us.  We have no doubts about what we’re doing or why, but it’s hard going and we need your prayers.” Heb 13:8

my calcutta

After a 14 hour work day yesterday with some of life’s little suprises I was more than geared to begin this morning.  I stack my Monday and Wednesdays to inspect houses and hit my pt sessions.  As of the beginning of the year I’ve devoted my Tuesdays and Thursdays to serve my community.  It’s been a huge sacrifice not to have the extra income from pt but I’d rather love more people and make less money.  I’d rather be remembered for how many lives I served, rather than how much money was in my bank account.

After putting in my early morning jog I was able to spend some time with my neighbors at Wood Manor nursing home – man I love my friends there.  My three closest friends are James “Jim” Bond, Harold, and Frank. 

 

I was able to meet Kris, the owner of Perfect Grounds Coffeeshop in Claremore – great guy with a heart for college students.  Followed that up meeting Shawn, Chi Alpha guy from RSU, for lunch at one of my favorite new resterants in town - asian diner.  I really believe God is allowing me to partner with him to serve the campus of RSU in the future.

Tonight I was able to attend a young professional dinner.  I had the privilege of meeting Brandt (mayor of Claremore), Matt (assistant city manager) and a few others that are leading this community.  I’ve been praying for our city leaders and how I can serve them and it was cool to now have some faces with the names.

Mother Teresa once told a young man that had asked her for advice in life.  She told him to find his own Calcutta.  I have taken that advice as well.  Claremore is my Calcutta and I have chosen to give my life to this community.

where do you feel like your calcutta is?

a true servant

This morning i got to talk to my one and only sister Shara.  I love her so much.  She actually introduced me to Amy and played a vital role in us getting together.  They are so much alike and are close friends.  I don’t think it is by chance that I found someone that is a pure mixture of my mom and my sister whom i admire and adore.

She gave me perhaps the greatest compliment in the world.  She told me that I was a servant.  It was humbling, but I must say that though I attempt to serve I am far from that.  But…. one day when my life is over – if people remember me as being a servant than I will feel that my life’s purpose was done. 

My desire is to place a towel around my arm each day as though I’m a waiter, to serve the forgotten in Claremore Oklahoma.  I want to come home after serving and be drenched in sweat.  I believe serving is simply loving.  My prayer is that as one serves they are telling someone else that they are loved.  Should our purpose be to serve others with an agenda?  Should we be doing it so that we will receive something in return?  Are we seeking recognition, a pat on the back, or a “volunteer of the year” award from our community?  What if we simply served not expecting anything in return.  What if we served others with no intention of turning them into a story to make us look more righteous?  What if we served someone we didn’t even know, would never see again, and no one ever knew about it?  Would we still serve them?   The true test of a servant is how you respond when you’re treated like one.

There’s so many people in our communities that are looking for someone that will think less of themselves to lend a hand.  Why is it that people belong to certain organizations?  cults?  religions?  clubs?  social groups?  My guess is that someone stepped out to serve them and love them and even though maybe they didn’t neccessarily believe in what that person represented – they decided to be apart because they were loved and felt belonged. 

 My question: Shouldn’t we as the church be that for people?  Shouldn’t we that represent Christ be that? 

I ask myself sometimes.  If I wasn’t brought up in church what type of social network would I be involved with or what kind of faith system would I have?  If someone was a Buddist, Atheist, Jehovah’s Witness – you fill in the blank – if they served me with no agenda and loved me and took interest in me.  Would I be apart of that now?

One of my good friends is an agnostic.  He is an incredible guy that loves people.  He is the main computer guy at his company and has taken time out in the past to help me with my computer issues.  I would rather hang around him then alot of past Christians that I’ve known.  If I had to call someone a true servant – it would be Vlad and I’m proud to call him my friend.

laser sharp focus

This weekend I was challenged by an article by Troy Jacobsen from triathlete magazine on having laser sharp focus.  He stated there is one thing that separates a good athlete from a really good one — beyond basic natural talent and ability – it is the ability to focus on race day.  Competitive athletes at the highest level train their ability to stay focused in the moment until they cross the finish line. My wife amy woke up this past Saturday morning focused to not allow 30 degree weather with wet conditions to get in the way of her first 5K finish.  She never stopped running and she inspires me as a mom of two kids to do something that she had never attempted.  She’s been there for me through so many races over the past two years – it was a joy to step back and be the cheerleader!

As I begin a new week I’m callenged to clear my mind and get focused again.  I’ve once heard it said, “He who chases two rabbits catches neither.” What is the one rabbit that you need to let escape into the hole in the ground and what is the one rabbit this week you need to have laser sharp focus? 

Don’t forget that your focus determines your reality. 

On a side note:

i’ve never done a run with my senior pastor before.  pd (pastor dave) ran the 10K so we waited around to cheer him to the finish.  he’s an awesome man that i’m growing to trust and respect.  sometimes i wander if i would still be on staff at claremore assembly of god if this man would have been there seven years ago.  i am looking forward to building a long-term relationship with him and to serving this community together.

a belated valentine dinner

last night amy sacrificed big time and allowed me to delay our valentine’s day until tonight.  wood manor assisted living had their annual party and several requested me to be there.  i’ve only been volunteering for a few weeks, but feel like i have adopted so many grandma’s and grandpa’s.  so many ladies drooled over cale and camden.  i wandered how many don’t have grandson’s they get to see or touch.  james “jim” bond is one of my closest friends.

amy came home tonight and camden helped me hook her up with some steak and shrimp – hopefully that made up for last night.  i don’t want to ever put my wife or family on the back burner.  i feel like i did last night but all i can do is learn from it and be thankful i have an understanding wife.