i am an ironman

Pre-Race

The day before we checked in most of our equipment which later was troubling – hoping I got everything in those stinken bags!  It has become a little tradition of mine to eat Hibachi the night before a big race.  The secret sauce never seems to bother me too much.

 

I managed to get around five hours of asleep before my one of three alarms went off at 3:45am.  The 3 b’s: bagel w/ peanut butter, banana, and red bull always seem to do the trick.  I took a warm shower, put on the body glide, heart rate strap, and took off.  After pumping my tires (same set that a good friend of mine had weeks previously gotten two flats on in one ride) we walked about 20 minutes to the swim start.  My heart was racing knowing that this would be one of the longest days of my life.  I couldn’t believe how long the line was to the swim.  I was able to see the family and was thrilled to see them wearing orange tye dye shirts with “Go Ricky!” on the front.  I knocked out a bottle of Gatorade, used the toilet one more time, and downed a gu gel as the gun went off.  There was no looking back as I drew closer to jumping into the water and from here on it was a complete blur, similar to when I got married or when Amy delivered our boys.

 

Swim

I managed to jump on top of my friend Ryan as I entered the water.  I stayed close to the island’s edge and tried to simply get into a rhythm.  It amazed me to come on a guy within 300 yards of the start all ready going to a butterfly stroke – dude must have had an incredibly long swim!   I knew the swim was 2.4 miles, but was in complete disarray when after passing the island it stretched out far than I could see.  When I made the turn to head back my watch read 32 minutes and I was looking forward to what was supposed to be a down current swim back in.  When I was under one of the bridges, I took five strokes and realized I wasn’t going anywhere.  That was beyond frustrating, but I decided to close my eyes and keep stroking. 

I managed to pee over six times in the water and while doing so lost ability to use my legs.  The best secret I learned with the skin suit (we were unable to use a wetsuit – stink) was that anytime I farted – the air would cause me to inflate and felt like it gave me more buoyancy!  You better believe I did that as much as I could!  I continued to keep my eyes on the m dot buoys and at last saw the crowd awaiting – the thoughts of seeing my family captivated my efforts.  One guy elbowed me three times, didn’t care if it was accidental, I launched a blow to his head and he stopped.  When I reached the stairs at 1:27:50 I had trouble simply stepping straight on them and racked myself coming out – not motivation for boarding the bike!

 

T1

I caught a snapshot of my Mom & Dad and In laws.  I got to give Camden a big kiss on the cheek, in which afterwards he would reply that I got him all wet!  I’ve never been one to waste time during transitions, because I know that you aren’t making any forward progress during this time.  I took the skin suit off and got sprayed with sunscreen and took off after 3:09.  I heard echo’s of my name but was still rattled from the swim. 

 

Bike

I knew the first 10 miles or so would be flat, from the previous day’s drive, and wanted to take advantage.  I still don’t feel like I pushed too hard, but perhaps did a little.  It was one of the most beautiful rides I’ve been on and was gorgeous to see the horses of Kentucky gallop in the fields as we passed by.  There was one loop that went into a valley, which I later found out a rider went off the side of the cliff.  It was a tough climb back up, so glad for the training rides in OK.  All I could think about was getting to mile 38 for the first loop of La Grange to see my family.  They were all spread out so once again it was quick split second snapshots that I would gleam from for the next several hours.  My mom held up a sign she made that stated what I heard from her many times in little league, “You can do it Ricky!”. 

The most discouraging part of the ride was seeing signs for mile 70 for the second loop, and I was only at 40.  I was completely focused during my ride, taking in Gatorade, but failing to take in nearly enough gu gels – it would come back to bite me in the end.  I later realized I was only taking in less than 300 calories an hour on my bike!!  I was burning far more.  I saw a guy during that first loop just droop over off his bike and do sideward flips.  Many were off under the trees to get into the shade, others that were larger sized, I wasn’t quite sure how they would ever finish.  All I could think about was mile 68 to see my family again.  I had waited for nearly two hours just to briefly lay eyes on my precious wife and quickly manage to lift my left arm that was numb and send her a kiss.  I quickly speeded up with all intentions of looking far better than how I really felt.   I heard the background voice from my Dad yell out as it quickly faded away, as I entered the longest 20 miles on a bike I’ve ever known.  I knew already what was coming from the first loop and knew that my legs were already beginning to drain. 

At around mile 80 I felt like my legs were done.  I started coughing and could feel nausea setting in and knew with the 92 degree heat – I might be in trouble.  I didn’t think I was going to make it up some of the hills.  I’ve never gotten off to walk up a hill and had no intentions of doing so in my Ironman.  My goal was to stay on that bike and never get off till I was done.  I peed numerous times and never got off.  I went through one rest stop and almost took out a volunteer.  I could feel my morale begin to weaken, but started thinking of what I was doing, where I was, who was waiting for me, all those that were praying, and said to myself, “I AM GOING TO BE AN IRONMAN!  I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST THAT STRENGTHENS ME!  I AM GOING TO MAKE THOSE THAT LOVE ME PROUD OF ME!  I CAN DO THIS!  I begin to pray and from miles 85-112 I can honestly say I felt a resurgence of strength and power in my legs.  I started passing everyone that had passed me, later realizing that I had probably passed over 300 riders total on my bike leg.  I kept my heart rate down and knew once again the last 10-15 miles would be along the river, flat, and with wind to my back, would carry me like I had wings and left me at an average of 17.16mph!  Once again I imagined the look in my Mom & Dad’s eyes, my wife’s, my In-laws, and my two little boys!  I jumped off my bike to quickly catch some snapshots that after 6:31:32 on a bike became all worth it!

 

T2

As I began running toward the transition tent, the nausea in my throat became more evident but quickly faded as I made every attempt to hurry through as I wanted to keep moving forward.  I saw guys stretched out on chairs with no motivation to continue on, many were sickened by the heat and exhaustion.  I grabbed three ½ bananas and started to run down the shoot.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw some rapid movement through the crowd.  It was an orange tye dye shirt and with one contact lense already dried out, I saw my father running with the proudest eyes and expression I’ve ever seen.  He continued to run as I passed my MNL as she held Camden.  I threw him one of my bananas and continued to keep running after 6:48.

 

Run

The run felt really good as I went out over the bridge and back and was able to hook up with another soon-to-be Ironman at the same pace.  We ran together, getting to know each other, for several miles before she sped off.  I decided to take a friend’s advice and make it a goal to run every mile and walk through the rest stops, while re-loading my nutrition.  I would drink Gatorade, water every other stop and drink coke the other.  I would switch between ½ bananas, oranges, and pretzel sticks.  I grabbed wet sponges at every stop and would drench myself with them – not sure what I would have done without those little saviors.  I could tell my socks were twisted, but just didn’t have any desire or energy to stop my pace and fix them – later they would become major problems as blisters formed. 

I was really hoping that my family would somehow be able to be out on the run course somewhere – couldn’t bare the thought of not being able to see them for over four more hours.  The longest run of the year had been 18 miles so I knew eventually a wall would be coming.  At mile 12 my Dad appeared running beside me.  In his comical way he begin to encourage me, “Come on kid should have ate your Wheaties!”.  I was actually concerned for him as his face began to turn a dark red!  I needed him to be there more than he’ll ever know and he was.  My parents told me months before they were not going to be able to make it due to circumstance.  I had trained most of the year thinking they would be and when they told me I was shattered.  They called me about a month before that indeed they would be at the finish line.  Now here he was running beside me.  I would later come across a guy my age running and his dad running beside him.  The guy stopped and screamed at his father to stop running with him.  I saw the complete heart-broken eyes stop as he shouted out to those around, “that’s my son and I’m proud of him!”.  I thought dude if you only knew how much that meant to him.  Amy had given me encouraging cards from people, but I had no strength to reach around and pull them – they would have to remain to the end – something I’d look forward to reading later.

I had no idea that the run looped right in front of the finish line and I could see runners go through and the words, “You are an Ironman” being stated.  I was hurting and quickly losing strength, but the taste of that sight fueled me forward.  I was already tearing up with overwhelming joy as I started my second loop.  Amy came out and ran beside me with the most earnest concern of how I was doing.  All I could tell her was, “my feet hurt and I’m feeling done”.  As I kissed Cale on the cheek – it would be the sweetest touch – I would experience for the longest hours of my life coming up shortly. 

I had no desire at all to go back out for the second loop.  The oranges, pretzels, bananas, and gu gels literally made me sick looking at them.  My eyes started getting more blurry and the voices of encouragement by volunteers became more of a faded murmur.  The eyes of those that were alongside me said it all – exhaustion, weakening bodies, droopy limbs, and postures that were bent over.  I continued to keep my pace and knew that all I had to do was keep running to each rest stop and then I could walk averaging 15 minutes a mile – that would get me to my goal of 13:30 and at worst 14 hours. 

I made the turn at mile 20 and stopped being able to eat anything.  The nausea came back with a far greater magnitude now and I felt like anytime I was going to blow.  The longest endurance session of my life up to this point was a century ride that lastest over 7 hours with several breaks.  I was now at over 12 hours.  I stopped running to every rest stop.  I started running ½ way and then a quarter of the way.  It started getting dark and I could see less people in front of me.  I reached mile 23 and started feeling pain below my belly button and hadn’t ever felt that before.  I started to get pain in places I never knew.  I started to run again and realized everything in my stomach felt like it was coming up and the pain grew.  I experienced panic and uncertainity for the first time in the race. 

For the first time all day I had the piercing thought, “Am I going to finish?  Everyone is waiting, so many are cheering me on and watching a screen from many miles away!  Am I going to make it?”  All of a sudden my goal time began to fade and then my 14 hour goal began to fade.  It now became clear this would be the start of my Ironman.  Everything I had worked so hard for, all the races, all the rides, all the runs by myself to prepare, all the laps in the pool for the past 3 years – it was about this moment.  I attempted to run to a stoplight and then would have to stop.  I attempted to run to the next light pole and had to stop.  Amy’s cousin at mile 24 caught me and I told him to tell my family I would be there shortly.  It was so disappointing to know that I had gotten through the swim strongly, had the bike ride of my life, and the first 13 miles, 20 miles of this run had gone so successfully.  I didn’t want to not finish strong.  One spectator after the next would yell out to me and others walking those last several miles, “don’t give up finish strong, come on!”.  I thought inwardly you have no idea how bad I want to sprint to the end.  I have run 2 miles so many times and it was a breeze.  Now 2 miles felt like 20.  I remember thinking if I only had my IPod with some encouraging music.  At mile 25 I saw the oldest participant at age 75 approach the first loop of the run – it doesn’t appear that he will make the cut off time of 17 hours – but man he’s so focused and determined. 

The last mile become the loneliest time I’ve ever experienced.  I felt completely all alone like never before.  A few teenagers stayed with me and walked and asked me questions, said I was crazy, and left.  I wanted them to walk with me so bad.  Just any other human being.  Then… I began to pray again.  “Jesus you never leave me nor forsake me.  I trust you.  You’ve brought me this far and I am not going to give up!”.  From the beginning this race was a metaphor and I knew it now more than ever.  I wanted to stop and just rest to the side.  I wanted to just give up even with a mile to go.  NO!!!  I was going to be a finisher no matter how hard it got.  I made that decision long before this moment ever came.  I had visualized this race in my mind many months before.  I finally reached the first corner and could hear the music and see the lights.  I made the next corner and took a huge breath with tears in my eyes.

 

Finish line

I could see the shoot.  I could see tons of people and lights.  I could see my destiny.  I could see my dream about to become a reality.  It was so surreal.  It was like this whole day was a blur.  My moment had arrived.  I mustered everything I had and began to run with the greatest sense of self-pride that I’ve ever had!  I saw many faces out of the corner of my eyes, but only had eyes for the finish.  I started pointing up to heaven thanking God for the health, the weight loss, the goal, the dream, him being with me to make this happen.  I gave him Praise and wanted everyone to know it.  It was his strength not my own that had reached me to this point.  I ran in slow motion as I crossed my finish line with a run of 6:21:07 and a finishing time of 14:30:26.  I was an Ironman! 

I looked into the eyes of my cheerleaders.  I embraced hugs and heard the cries of my wife and my mom.  Everything in me wanting to cry but I had no more fluids in my body.  The medal was placed on my head and I was an Ironman.  To me this was the closest thing I’ve ever experienced to what heaven may look like one day.  This was an earthly finish line and I can’t wait to hear, “Ricky welcome into heaven, well done my faithful servant”.  My desire is to be an “iron sharpens iron” man to all others in my life!

 

Post-race

I could barely stand up and wanted desperately to get hooked up to IV’s.  They wouldn’t let me until I threw up, in which I didn’t.  I saw so many “Ironmen” layed out on cots and it looked like death.  It looked like a Red Cross tent during a war.  I was able to get a deep massage, even with chills all over my body.  My feet were hurting from blisters, chaplips, and sun burn on my upper arms like crazy!  As we left – the double cheeseburger and fries from Wendy’s made it all better!

 

It has been four days from this watermark experience in my life.  Camden has watched my highlight DVD over 20 times, keeps wearing my medal, and has already informed me that he too will be an Ironman.  If he decides to do one I will support him all the way!  In many ways I’d like to take all my lessons learned and do one again as well believe it or not.  I’m currently wearing my finisher sweatshirt, thinking of already putting my MDOT sticker on my truck (can’t believe that hasn’t happened already) and wanting to encourage everyone around me to go after a dream!  I think the biggest thing I didn’t train for was the post-race feelings.  I have had some lows the past few days after such a high, but it is starting to leak away slowly. 

I have no idea how it truly feels to be a soldier serving in another country and then coming home, but I caught a glimpse of perhaps how they might feel.  No one really knows all they’ve really been through.  There’s the big celebration when they get back and then everyone quickly gets on with their lives.  I praise Christ for all those that encouraged me, no equipment failures, and for the health to finish my race!

 

LESSONS LEARNED

 

 

01 in this race of life you are always surrounded by a cloud of cheerleaders

     encouraging you along each part of your journey

02 the enemy will try to elbow you but you just got to give it right back and keep

      taking strokes

03 sometimes you just got to close your eyes and have faith you are moving

     forward when it doesn’t seem like you are going anywhere

04 volunteers are the unsung heroes of life

05 a father’s presence along each phase of your race is absolutely criticial,

    he is always running behind, beside, and in front of you cheering you on!

06 the faster you can get into a rhythm the better off you’ll be

07 when everything seems blurry keep going

08 keep your eyes focused on the goal, don’t get off, just keep peddling

09 don’t waste time in transitions

10 valleys will come so rely on your past experiences

11 take as many snapshots as possible because you never know how long you’ll

     need them

12 don’t ever ever ever take your family for granted

13 when all alone in life, when everyone else seems far away, jesus is so so close

14 rely on others to help you keep your pace

15 don’t forget to take rest stops and drench yourself – life is a marathon not

     a sprint.  you can’t ever drink enough even when you feel full!

16 let the taste of the finish line recharge you when you having nothing left

17 when you panic and feel like quitting, cry out to jesus to get refocused

18 always give credit  by praising Christ that gives you your strength to finish

19 little eyes are watching with admiration – encourage them to dream big

     dreams!

20 take time when the race is over to celebrate with the ones you love