Secret Blend Relationships

March 30, 2008 — 1 Comment

What a day!  This morning I woke up and ran a 10 miles with my new running partner.  Matt is the assistant city manager in Claremore.  He’s a young guy that truly has a vision to see this community progress and form a positive identity in this state.  What’s even better is he has a heart for God.  Amy was able to go out with his wife Rachel for a bike ride and we were able to have lunch afterwards.

Tonight we went out with some old friends that I hadn’t seen in over two years.  As I was listening to their story and how they got married – it just boggled my mind how big God is.  Moises grew up in Brazil and Lana in Oklahoma.  The way they ended up together is a miracle within itself.

I love developing new friends and getting together with old ones.  There’s nothing like sharing a meal with others and talking about life.  It’s crazy to think just over a year ago Amy and I would stay at home all the time and never really go out much with others.  Now we try to keep our schedule available to get together with others frequently.

Did that just start by falling into our laps?  Did people all of a sudden just start randomly calling us?  Are we so special that people would come over and long to be with us?  No way!  We learned a simple lesson that many people don’t want to work at.  To have a friend you must first be one.  If we sit around and just wait for someone to email, call, or come over – it will never happen.  It takes work.  It takes initiation.  It takes patience.

Most of us try to call and make an attempt and if it fails we give up.  We don’t want a one-way relationship.  I don’t know how many times I have felt like that – but man so many relationships would have been lost forever.

Simply put.. People want to be pursued.  They want you to talk about them.  They want you to be interested in what they are into.  If you desire to do that – you’ll have yourself a friend.  I’m no expert by any means.  I’m still learning this process.  One of the best books I’ve read about this is – The Secret Blend by Stan Toler.

What do you think?  How do you develop a friendship?  Is there someone you need to pursue that possibly could turn into a close friend?


One response to Secret Blend Relationships


    That sounds like a great book. I read a book titled, “How to Make People Like You in 60 Seconds or Less”, and it was a good read.

    Is Matt the guy they hired from Owasso?

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